Elle and I have decided that this New Year is a good time to begin looking at the friendships around you. Do you have some friends who just seem to drain you more than they fill you up? Maybe it’s time to evaluate the relationships around you. You deserve to be surrounded by a powerful community that lifts you up, supports you, and joins you in your journey of self-awareness.
- Constant Crisis. Of course sometimes friends are going to need us to support them through a difficult time. If you notice a pattern of constant turmoil and instability this could be a sign of a toxic friend.
- Can’t Celebrate your Successes. This is something we’ve noticed as a more subtle sign of a toxic friend; withholding the celebratory information to avoid contempt and jealousy.
- Chaotic and Moody. Do you have a friend who is constantly in conflict in their interpersonal relationships? This is evidence that this person may have difficulty with stability and may have the signs of being a toxic friend.
- Draining and Confusing. You shouldn’t walk away from a conversation with your friend and constantly feel drained and confused. Check in with yourself and think twice about the friends who bring you down.
How to break free of Toxic Relationships:
- Go slow and identify the relationships near you that seem concerning.
- Identify the qualities of positive friendships around you.
- Remember if this is someone who is toxic they could be a ticking time bomb. You don’t have to give an explanation nor are you in charge of their rescue. You can subtly slow down your interactions with them until you are no longer the crisis police.
- Lastly, remember you deserve great things and uplifting people to celebrate you! Take care of yourself first.
The Cynical Therapist came to be when two therapists became friends. SoulMates or Kindered Spirit Animals... Call us what you will.... We are two bad*** chics Licensed to teach you how to grow into your full potential and add some humor along the way.
Laurie Wilson and Elle Anzalone are both Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist practicing in Huntington Beach, CA.