As you get older, you learn. You gain insight and you grow. You learn about love. You learn that falling in love is intentional and that intent means letting go of the youthful past and making way for a healthy future. You learn that break-ups don’t have to be breakdowns. You learn that broken families don’t have to “act” broken. You learn that marrying your best friend is important. That flaws are not red flags and that red flags are worth attending to.
You learn that you are not going to change the person you are with. You learn to adapt. You learn that to keep a marriage vibrant it may take more work than anything you’ve endured in your life. You learn patience, perseverance, and a willingness to say you are sorry. You learn that when you are with the right person, your passion fuels the work. You learn that date nights should never stop. You learn that happiness comes when we stop expecting our relationship to be like other ones. You learn to ask your partner for what you want and do it politely. You never stop working on yourself.
You understand that forgiveness is golden and being stubborn leaves you restless. You learn that the grass only appears greener on the other side because you aren’t watering your own. You learn to compromise. Always give your best self to your partner and when you can’t- try harder. Travel together. Be supportive of one another’s dreams. Cuddle. Sleep in and have breakfast in bed. Bring her flowers often. Kiss him when he comes home. Hold hands. Compliment one another. Be empathetic.
You learn that the heart doesn’t just want what it wants. You learn that love is a passionate experience with your mind, body, and soul. Hold on tight to one another in hard times. Never let go. Talk. Listen. Listen more. Give all of yourself to the other person. Never look back with regret.
You learn something from each relationship you have. You learn to not wait on anyone to love you back. You learn to let go of things that aren’t yours. You learn to seek guidance when you don’t have the answer. You learn that you can love more than one person in a lifetime. You learn that each love is different but not comparable. When you learn about love, you give more. You open up. You feel free.
The Cynical Therapist came to be when two therapists became friends. SoulMates or Kindered Spirit Animals… Call us what you will…. We are two bad*** chics Licensed to teach you how to grow into your full potential and add some humor along the way.
Laurie Wilson and Elle Anzalone are both Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist practicing in Huntington Beach, CA.