Dating in the technology age makes seeing people more public than ever. Being in a relationship has now taken on two common talks amongst its newest cohorts:
1. The DRT (Define the relationship talk)
2. The FBO (a.k.a Facebook official talk).
When is a good time to update your relationship status?
Engaged: Right after she puts the ring photo up on her page. This should only go public after you have told your family and closest friends.
Married: This is a time to consummate not to update. Chances are all of the important people were at the wedding anyways. Update after the honeymoon.
It’s Complicated: Never. No one needs to know that you are having a difficult time. Then you get all the replies, are you okay? call me! what is going on? A bad situation becomes worse after updating it to 700 acquaintances. Talk to a therapist and keep your bad updates as private as possible.
In a Relationship: This is very couple specific. Take it slow, wait until they have met your family and close friends. *Update only when photos of the ex are off the grid.
Single: When you are single there is no reason to have your ex’s photos floating around your page, especially if they are in another relationship. Respect that it is time to move on. The most important memories will be the ones that last much longer.
We don’t bury boxes of old items in the backyard anymore. Facebook has become a place for us to take our love public, to be proud of our significant other, and to have a timeline of love our kids will keep with them forever. Share away, but remember the most important moments take place when you stop worrying about updates and start living and loving.
The Cynical Therapist came to be when two therapists became friends. SoulMates or Kindered Spirit Animals… Call us what you will…. We are two bad*** chics Licensed to teach you how to grow into your full potential and add some humor along the way.
Laurie Wilson and Elle Anzalone are both Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist practicing in Huntington Beach, CA.